Personal Growth

I will try not to overly rant right here on this like I did in the previous post... There's a part of me that wants to write books on developing yourself or youtube videos. I parted with some of my favorite possessions in order to pay bills and move forward. I feel this helped me to grow.

The one key I also discovered in this, when you want to change yourself and get away from a negative way of life.. you have to extract yourself from the triggers and move on. For me, being forced to move to Novi into a trailer was a phenomenal point of change. Instead of wasting my time with alcohol and chasing whores, I learned new skills. I became passionate about home improvement and through this I was able to get rid of pent up anger and feel a sense of accomplishment. This process also gave me something new that I didn't expect, a feeling of falling to the bottom. See when you live in a 800 dollar a month apartment and then move to a trailer where you have to use the living room til your bills are caught up and you can live alone... You gain a new perspective, a perspective of is this really what my life came to? In the positive I couldn't hide drinking if I even wanted to since I'm out in the open.

My last subject matter. I came to hear of something this week that made me feel some type of way. In the corporate world, people kiss ass.. backstab and put people down to move themselves along. I heard rumors someone who helped influence me had his reign end on some weirdness. I came to realize that, sometimes the actions you committed to put yourself ahead can come back to haunt you. Like karma, when you constantly put others down to raise yourself up or get their jobs and lives shaken up... you one day will have to deal with it happening to you. This is life happening, you just have to deal with it.

That's why one of my new philosophies is to put myself back into working hard and letting my work speak for me. It maybe a low key demeanor where you don't get much credit, but in reality if you pay your dues all things will work out when it's time. For me, I began to realize if I received certain things earlier than before I was ready they wouldn't last long. The goal isn't to be on top for a week, month or year.. the goal is to be on top forever.